ek to jungle me.n aag oopar se chaDDii me.n naag

Film : Dhol

Year of release : 2007

Spoken by : Gautam "Goti" Sisodiya

Spoken to : Himselves

This is a caper about a group of friends who move from one funny situation to another. This was a remake of a 1990 Malayalam film In Harihar Nagar which was later remade as MGR Nagaril in Tamil. Unfortunately did not do as well in Hindi. Pakkiya (Sharman Joshi) brings in a couple to live with them. The couple has actually run away from home. Goti is not too happy, as they themselves have many problems to face and cannot afford to complicate their lives further. So when they leave he says out aloud

"ek to jungle me.n aag, oopar se chaDDii me.n naag"

"एक तो जंगल में आग, ऊपर से चड़डी में नाग"

Aaj tak aisee good luck huyee nahee.n ki kisee ladies se pyaar ho jaaye

Film : Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi

Year of release : 2008

Spoken by : Surinder Sahni (Shah Rukh Khan)

Spoken to : Taani (Anushka Sharma)

This was an interesting film - funny in parts - but too many cliches. Typical YashRaj cloying stuff. YRF should outsource writing and direction - else it becomes far too predictable. But the film is still worth a watch and Shah Rukh comes up with a good performance. If you watch the films do not switch off the moment the closing credits start rolling. Do listen to Shah Rukh's commentary over the closing credits. I, for one, thought that that by itself redeemed the film.

Taani plays the role of a girl who has a husband who loves her very much, but she is running after 'love' and does not appreciate what she has. So once she tells Surinder that she can't love him and if he can't live forever without love then she would leave. A very patient and 'nice' Surinder says,

"pyaar kyaa hotaa hai Taani ji mujhe nahee.n pataa, aaj tak aisee good luck huyee nahee.n ki kisee ladies se pyaar ho jaaye"

"प्यार क्या होता है तानी जी मुझे नहीं पता, आज तक ऐसी गुड लक हुयी नहीं कि किसी लेडीज़ से प्यार हो जाये"

jahaa.n dekhtee hai.n ek rishtaa qaayam kar letii hai.n

Film : Kabhi Kabhie
Year of release : 1976
Spoken by : Amit Malhotra (Amitabh Bachchan)
Spoken to : Pooja Khanna (Rakhee Gulzar)

Amit is a poet and he has gone to Pooja's college to recite his poetry. Pooja (among all the other girls) is enamoured of this tall, shy poet with a great voice. When she goes to take his autograph, he starts flirting with her. He praises her eyes. Pooja asks him what's so special about her eyes. A normal person would have been cornered by such a direct question. But Amit is a poet. So he comes up with a great response. He says,

"jahaa.n dekhtee hai.n ek rishtaa qaayam kar letii hai.n"
"जहां देखती हैं एक रिश्ता क़ायम कर लेती हैं"

On a lighter note, I used to wonder (and still do) about the way the title of the film was written. Why was the first 'Kabhi' written with just the 'i' and the second 'Kabhie' is written with 'ie'. Do write in and let me know, in case you know the answer.

baap ne maarii me.nRhakii beTaa teerandaaz

Film : Prem Rog
Year of release : 1982
Spoken by : Radha's mother in law (Dina Pathak)
Spoken to : Radha's husband (Rajinder Nath)

Radha (Kiran Vairale) is Manorama's (Padmini Kolhapure) childhood friend. She gets married to Rajinder Nath and keeps him under her thumb. In one scene, Radha's husband comes in to the house looking for her. He sees his mother and asks her where Radha is. His mother is disgusted with her son running around Radha all the time. So she says

"baap ne maarii me.nRhakii beTaa teerandaaz"
"बाप ने मारी मेंढकी बेटा तीरंदाज़"

gilauree khaayaa karo gulfaam, zabaan qaaboo me.n rahtii hai

Film : Maqbool
Year of release : 2003
Spoken by : Jahangir Khan (Pankaj Kapoor)
Spoken to : Jaywant Wadkar (Palekar)

Vishal Bharadwaj is fast on the way to becoming one of the greatest directors of Indian cinema, if his oeuvre continues to grow the way it is. Who would have thought that after listening to the Maachis soundtrack that behind this soundtrack is such a great director. There have been actors-turned director, editors turned director, cinematographer turned director, scriptwriter turned director, choreographer turned director, even lyricist turned director. Music directors have turned producer but never director. But this is the first instance of a music director who turned director. As they say, "der aayad durust aaye".

Jahangir Khan is a mafia don. Palekar is a local politician. Palekar goes to meet Jahangir Khan and offers to remove Chief Minister Bhonsle (Shammi Narang) provided Jahangir supports him. Jahangir is a strong believer in loyalties and is offended by this suggestion. But his face does not betray his thoughts. He calmly offers Palekar some 'paan'. Palekar refuses. Jahangir beckons Palekar closer. When he is close enough he pulls his head and thrusts a paan down his throat. Follows that up with this slam dunk line

"gilauree khaayaa karo gulfaam, zabaan qaaboo me.n rahtii hai"
"गिलौरी खाया करो गुलफ़ाम, ज़बान क़ाबू में रहती है"

aam kitnaa bhi baRaa ho jaaye rahegaa Daal ke neeche

Film : Jugaad
Year of release : 2009
Spoken by : Commissioner I M Gupta (Govind Namdeo)
Spoken to : Murli (Vijay Raaz)

This is a film with a great premise and some very good actors. It was based on the 'sealing drive' in Delhi in 2007. The producer of this film was ostensibly one of those 'law-breakers' who were running a commercial enterprise from a residential area. In this film, he tries to show himself as a victim. That is the greatness of the Delhiite. He will break all the laws and will further try to prove himself as the aggrieved party if anyone tries to enforce the law. So the producer tries to tell us that this entire country is hopeless corrupt and that his act was an innocent gaffe compared to the transgressions happening elsewhere. But I will rant about Delhi and its lack of ethics later. Meanwhile back at the ranch,

Murli is Sandiip's friend and colleague. He tries to ensnare the municipal commissioner Gupta by taking snaps of the man in what the media classically calls 'compromising position'. But the commissioner is one up on him. When Gupta has foiled Murli's ploy, he comes up with this line

"aam kitnaa bhi baRaa ho jaaye rahegaa Daal ke neeche"

"आम कितना भी बड़ा हो जाये रहेगा डाल के नीचे"

ek drink to dushman ke saath lete hai.n

Film : Jaane Tu...Yaa Jaane Na
Year of release : 2008
Spoken by : Mahesh (Rajat Kapoor)
Spoken to : Jai Rathore (Imran Khan)

Jai's girlfriend Meghna (Manjari Phadnis) takes him home. Over dinner, Jai realises that Meghna's parents {Mahesh (Rajat Kapoor) and Sheela (Kitu Gidwani)} have a dysfunctional relationship. Mahesh offers Jai a drink and Jai accepts. This is the new Bollywood. Such a thing would never have happened even in the 80s and 90s.

A girl brings her boyfriend home to dinner. The father offers him a drink. The boy accepts. They all drink together. Even the girl's mother. Wait there is more.

Mahesh offers Jai another drink. Jai (who I think feels enough customs have been broken in one film) declines. Mahesh comes up with this classic line.

"ye kaisaa laRkaa hai...ek drink to dushman ke saath lete hai.n"
"ये कैसा लड़का है...एक ड्रिंक तो दुश्मन के साथ लेते हैं"

A lot of friendships are formed over drinks and tobacco smoke. Having been a teetotaler and non-smoker all my life, I have missed out on a lot of such friendships. Did I write 'missed out on'? Changed that to 'spared of '.